Everyone is looking for solutions to IBS, but has anyone stopped to wonder why it is called Irritable Bowel Syndrome (IBS)? This is actually a major key in understanding it better.
Irritable is on the same emotional scale as annoyed, frustrated, fed up, resentful – and dare we say it, angry.
We are so taken up with trying to handle IBS symptoms and just get through the day that we don’t get to take a step back and see how our bodies and minds react to old feelings.
I recently went through 3 events that showed me exactly how I deal with one particular emotion: anger. I was shown how anger had been running behind my IBS, and what I need to do differently.
A day in the life of an IBS sufferer
How often do you feel frustrated, fed up, resentful, and even angry?
Most people won’t admit it, but IBS sufferers live this daily.
Frustration at the IBS symptoms that just don’t seem to make any sense.
Fed up at being weighed down and slowed down by Irritable Bowel.
Resentful of all the people around them who can eat anything they like and are enjoying life.
Angry that your body keeps playing up, no matter what you eat or do.
If you suffer with Irritable Bowel, chances are that you are carrying old, and active anger in your system.
Our bodies can react to unresolved anger from the past, as well as what we are currently facing.
And it can run deep. I no longer have IBS, but frustration has been a daily companion for a long time. Even though I’ve been IBS free for over 9 years now, I recently had 3 experiences that clearly taught me a lot about anger, and what it can do in our bodies.
To recover from Irritable Bowel (IBS) I had released some. But I found that there was more.
1) Numbing out anger
Last month I went home and in a familiar situation during a meal, I got triggered. To start with I used speech to react. Then speech went offline and I could no longer react. I just phased out. Like when I was a child.
As the feeling of anger rose, my system numbed out.
I spent all night with my stomach going round like I was on a ferry in a storm. The high charge that had trouble dissipating was anger.
2) Being on the receiving end of anger
10 days later I was hit by a bout of gastroenteritis. This is where my IBS originally seemed to have started as a young adult, so I found it curious.
I actually saw it start. I was trying to help someone online and they suddenly went into a rage. It was like I took a direct hit in my bowels.
It was very weird and felt awful. Was I feeling the other person’s anger – or my own?
I had forgotten just how utterly wretched you feel as your body empties from both ends at once. Then I got nauseous and very gassy.
[In my experience with IBS coaching, regular gas is often about carrying resentment or anger. We can have some very valid reasons for carrying all that. The problem is that those feelings can be setting of recurring IBS symptoms.]
3) Anger welling up and creating pain
I very painfully wrenched my shoulder while cutting the hedge. That’s the official story. However as I was cutting the hedge my husband said something that seriously pushed my buttons.
That evening my shoulder was so painful I had to sit upright to try to get some sleep. It felt like I had broken it, but I knew I hadn’t.
Later I realized I had pushed down the anger I had felt – and actually turned it on myself (so I wouldn’t be abusive in any way). I had just been abusive to myself instead! And boy was it painful (inflammed) for days.
Once I saw this I started allowing myself to feel the feeling of anger in my body, and the pain dropped.
“Anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to anything on which it is poured.” – Mark Twain
The other essential emotion involved with anger
The other part of this is that in each situation I felt helpless. Helpless to stop my stomach whirring all night. Helpless having gastroenteritis take over. And helpless to stop the severe pain in my shoulder and sleep.
These two parts are related.
Anger gets bad press as an emotion. We think of people getting violent and abusive. This often happens when we try to contain anger instead of actually allowing it.
When we allow it, and have no suppressed anger in our system it can be expressed as simply as “No, that doesn’t work for me.”
Anger comes up in us when a boundary is crossed, or something does not sit at all well with us.
I believe it is an attempt to give us the power we need to move out of helplessness and into action.
But we have been taught that anger is bad. So we push it back down – and stay stuck.
Irritable Bowel IBS: How to start recognizing anger
The nicest people hold a lot of anger in their system. Often because they have been on the other end of anger, and have been really hurt by it.
One telltale sign is that you tend to avoid conflict at all costs – and do everything to keep the peace.
However, this comes at a cost. Repressed anger can be a major IBS trigger. If we continue on blindly without noticing our anger and where it shows up, we can’t interrupt it.
The problem is, repressed anger can feel so volatile, and we can feel scared that we’ll lose control. So here’s a gentle way to start noticing and expressing your anger:
One thing you can start doing is gently noticing when you are getting frustrated, angry, resentful or irritated. These are all forms of anger.
Not to make yourself wrong. But to actually allow an important part of you to exist. To receive the message when someone crosses an important boundary, or when you are not getting your needs met.
Grab a sheet of paper and pen and write out what you are feeling upset about. Write it as it comes with swear words and all. Notice where you are feeling it in your body.
If you can, get curious and notice if you have a system where you don’t allow anger. Or turn it onto yourself. Maybe because you don’t want to become like that person, and you don’t want to be angry.
We’re not talking about getting abusive and being like them. We are talking about allowing yourself to feel what you really feel a little more.
I go into this work in a gentle and deeply supported way in private IBS coaching.
Alison Adenis | IBS Interrupt™ Coach
Important Note: My work focuses on trigger identification and release based on my personal experience, training, and client work.
This content is for informational and educational purposes only.
I am not a doctor. For diagnosis and clinical treatment, always consult your medical professional.