IBS : Do you have a narcissist in your life?

a narcissist desert

Did you know that being in regular contact with a narcissist can cause IBS symptoms?

Whether that person is a family member, a partner, a boss or coworker, they may be an important IBS trigger for you.

You may be nodding your head knowingly here, or actually wondering whether you know one. So here’s how you can recognize a narcissist.

What is a narcissist?

A narcissist is a type of person who has a deep wound of insecurity – but you would not know it from the outside. They tend to be quite charming and attractive. Yet beyond all the hype their relationship to you tends to be conditional and superficial. You can feel alone and confused in their presence.

They LOVE the company of sensitive, empathic people who look after them and boost them up.

How do I know this? Because I have a narcissist in my life.

How can I spot a narcissist?

Here are 10 questions to ask yourself:

  1. Is everything always about them?
  2. Do they act in an entitled way, as if they deserve special treatment?
  3. Do they often bring the conversation back to themselves?
  4. Are they always looking for validation and admiration?
  5. Do you feel like a convenience? Never a priority?
  6. Do they pull you in, and then push you away?
  7. Do you feel alone or confused in their presence?
  8. Are they critical, judgmental and drag you down?
  9. Do they wield money as power over you?
  10. Do they tend to put you down, make it your fault and are insensitive?

If any of this sounds familiar, read on.

The problem with narcissists is that they are incapable of deep, unconditional love. Their sense of love is more self-serving.

YOU have a role in THEIR life.

As long as you are telling them they are wonderful and keep them on a pedestal, everything will be well.

One day they’re fine, then they may get moody or angry with you – or even cut you off. This can wreak havoc with your emotions and your digestive system.

It is actually more common than you may think.

Does this mean I will have IBS forever?

The narcissist in my life turned out to be an important trigger for my IBS.

However I didn’t see that for a long time. And I certainly didn’t see the link with their behaviour and my IBS.

I only really saw it in my last job where, guess what, I found I had a narcissistic boss. Charming at first, then out to use me either as a scapegoat and/or to take credit for my work and further her career.

At first I went into blaming and feeling resentful – and my IBS just got more and more chronic.

Time for change

I stayed in that helpless, hopeless space some time – and then decided that this pattern needed to change.

Having looked at research into neuroplasticity and knew this could be done.

I decided I was never going to be dominated by a narcissist again. Ever!

I went back into the past and released the emotions and trauma linked to being on the receiving end of a narcissist. There was a lot to release. To start with I got outside help. Then I trained in NLP as well as other modalities and gradually learned to recognise triggers and release them myself.

This was a big part in releasing chronic IBS.

Now I can “smell” a narcissist a mile off! And I no longer suffer with IBS and food intolerance.

What about you?

Do you have a narcissist in your life and is it seriously playing on your health?

Although you can’t change them, you CAN change the relationship you have with them. However the best step is to get them out of your life if you can – and replace them with people who will support you.

Because you’re worth it.